MATRIMONIAL COLUMNS-AN ARRANGED DISASTER..!!

Wanted a fair, beautiful, thin bride preferably working in an MNC for a handsome, dashing man 5’8’’ in height working in an MNC, annual income 10 lakhs, house in Kolkata, only son of parents. Bride should be homely, caring and within 5’3’’ height. If interested contact Mr.Haldar at 09*********.

Quite common isn’t it? Every morning you turn the pages of your newspaper you will find at least one page dedicated to matrimonial. However this page is significant to both the genders in two ways. For the women its just a way for parents to tame their ultra rebellious girl into the ‘’good girl’’ shoes. These girls have had experimented so much with men that after a point of time they themselves put on the good girl image, ’’at least the guy earns 10 lakhs for crying out loud’’..’’at least he has a house of his own’’. That should work if marrying a stranger is counted in. For the men, matrimonial are the perfect way for losers to find their mate. More than often these men have perfectly oiled and combed in a unipolar direction hair. If you are a girl don’t get seduced by his 5’8’’ something height, you have no idea how hard it was on his mother’s side to deliberate horlicks into his diet till his 30’s.It wouldn’t be surprising if his mother offered puja’s for his growth in every sense. The smarter MBA types know how to hide their inabilities in high heeled shoes; after all you have to give them something for having struggled through 2 years. By handsome and dashing they are only referring to the guy who has a surprisingly small belly (which is quite hard to find in 30’s men) and is facially symmetric. This may seem paradise to Indian women who have pretty much accepted the fact that symmetric, normal and smart are three qualities that cannot lie in one Indian man’s body, but don’t get befooled !The picture sent to the prospective lady might be crafty. So behind that suitably pleasing smile may lie a set of hideously discolored disoriented teeth and let’s not even get into the magic of tummy tuckers. So if you aren’t 100% sure that the picture is true map of the original sight, needless I’d say PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK. Don’t think that just because most of these men seem ‘’decent’’ they haven’t done those normal guy stuff’s. In fact they have watched and fantasized about nude, hot women so much that even their imaginations begged for mercy. If they have told you that they are ‘’experienced with women’’ they basically refer to the fact that they spent a better part of their lives chasing after women aimlessly but bagged none. Sensing their utter desperation to get laid, the parents play angels and use matrimonials to save their sons lives from utter doom. Girls are smart as they know how to experiment well before marriage and then to go ‘’by protocol’. You would be amazed at the audacity of these families and irony of life. Audacity because even if their sons are the living imprint of Scary Movie Part I they demand for angels from Cinderella Story and irony of what a decent bank balance and a house can give people like them.

Thank the good Indian arranged marriage system which saved the lives of many desperately seeking men and rebellious yet happy women.